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Jim Gibbons Hopes to Set World Record for Beating a Dead Horse

Jim Gibbons Attempting to Break World's Record for Beating a Dead HorseSports fans around the world have been stunned, neigh nay, stupefied as they watch Gøøber Jim Gibbons, the Man with Absolutely Nothing to Lose, pull his DOA gubernatorial charade into the nearly not-impossible category by, of all things, championing a frivolous law suit.

But now the Nevada electorate is afire–okay, maybe barely cognizant–of how long the Guv can, pardon the expression, keep it up. How long can he keep sidestepping the traps and snares of the Nevada Revised Statutes, they wonder, as he pursues the futile goal of actually winning a suit against the U.S. Government over the new Health Care Law?

No, wait. That’s not the way to put the point. The real question is: how long can his come up with legal gyrations that keep the attention of the fickle Nevada electorate?

Just consider the nature of the gyrations so far:

  • Gibbons climbs on the sue-the-gum’ment-over-health-care bandwagon only to learn that he cannot command the Attorney General of Nevada to sue on the mere whim of a desperate politician groping for attention in an election year.
  • The crack Gubernatorial Staff/Re-elect Gibbons Campaign Team know, however, that the success or failure of such a lawsuit doesn’t really matter–it’s how much column space the Gube gets in the local papes and the number of seconds of free TV he gets on the bøøb-tube that matters. So, they instigate an exchange of letters with the AG, not to gain insight into the constitutional question of whether a desperate Guv can sue on a mere whim, but to generate controversy in the press.
  • Hooking on to the frustration of Nevadans mired in the current non-economy of a state ruined in part by small-minded small-government politics, Gibbons is able to grab some face time on the 24/7 Desperate Republican Cable Channel for being one of a handful of desperate Gubes needing something to distract folk from the non-economy they helped to create.
  • Faced with the fact that he has no legal standing to pursue a Nevada lawsuit against the health care plan, Gibbons decides to hitch his wagon to another suit where another desperate Gube in another state ruined by small-minded small-government politics desperately attempts to distract his constituency from his failed economic non-policies.
  • After carefully making every missive from the Gube’s office available on the Internets, the crack Gube Staff/Re-elect Gumbo committee accuses the AG of violating attorney-client privilege when she makes her responses public, in a desperate attempt to keep the jaded eye of the fickle public trained on the Guv–despite the fact that the people of Nevada are the actual client of the suit, not the Governor hisself. (RJ,SlashPolitics)

But, just when you’d think the Gøøb has tuckered out his arm smacking moribund equestrian flesh, there appears yet another press release threatening yet another swing.

This all just goes to show, dear reader, that a few weeks is as nothing to the likes of Jim “15-years” Gibbons.

[UPDATE: and it's working: Gibbons polls numbers are up. (INP)]

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