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Sheep Dip Gube Won't Introduce Sheep Dip

Overworked Veto StampThe party-poop gube seems to have lost his sense of humor. He’s refused to appear in the 48th Sheep Dip thingy weirdo northerners participate in this time of year.

Now, I’ve never been to Sheep Dip since I get nosebleeds anyplace north of Tonopah, but apparently they lampoon local celebrities in humorous skits. They tend to set the bar for what counts as a celebrity pretty low, too, by inviting the Gube to take part.

This year the Guv refused to show up because they sang funny little song about him:

Music to Michael Jackson’s “Beat it” starts in the background as the governor starts to rap:

“Legislative session ‘bout done around here

All the tax increase bills, it’s time they disappear

Your days are numbered now, my choice is very clear…”

(The governor now takes his formerly hidden, white-gloved hand out, with a large VETO stamp and to the “Beat It” music stamps hard on a number of bills)

“I’ll VETO… just VETO!”

(At this point, in the spirit of the song, he spins around in his chair. *Alternative: a “dream sequence,” in which he falls into a dream of acting/dancing like the King of Pop. Cut to the “Stunt Governor” who, with his identity veiled and dressed in some Michael Jackson regalia, begins to dance/act some of Jackson’s signature moves. Audience sees the lyrics of the second verse scrolling across the screen.)

“No magic here, you should watch my left hand

Furloughed state employees, you’ll have to understand

Taxes are evil, I’ll cut budgets instead

I’ll veto, and I don’t care if you’re mad

I’ll veto, veto, veto, veto

All these bills will be defeated

Kill the new fuel tax, it isn’t right

Voters approved it, I’ll kill it tonight

I’ll veto, veto

Just veto, veto

I’ll veto, veto

Just veto, veto” (RGJ)

Huh. Seems mild enough. Gibbons claimed that the lyrics somehow mocked the death of Michael Jackson. Actually, the only death being mocked is the governor’s career, and he’s doing the mocking.

By the way, it’s almost 5pm when I’m writing this, and the Gube’s campaign report still isn’t in. What’s he skeered of??

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