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The Last Train to Gibbersville

All aboard the Jim Gibbons Love Train!

Let's see if we can sort out the "puzzling" chain of events surrounding the recent train wreck over trains:

  1. Harry Reid secures $45 million in pork barrel spending for designing the maglev train project, and consequently forgets about it. Only in fed gov, the finance industry, or Iraq can one so easily lose a palette with so much money on it.
  2. Harry Reid, to secure support of jaded, faded rightwing extremist Siggy McJuiceman, decides he prefers an alternative train project to Hooterville–or some equally silly place nobody would want to go.
  3. The putative Nevada Governor, stung by complaints that he doesn't know how to spend stimulus money–after all, stuffing dollar bills in a g-string is more his style–prematurely ejaculates that the state will be getting the funds, which the Guv actually did nothing to secure except residing in Harry Reid's district and becoming governor due to a gypsy curse.
  4. Railroad authority says it didn't officially say anything about giving out the money, which the governor didn't do anything to get and Reid doesn't want anymore and may or may not be coming anyway after Harry makes a call to the railroad authority today.
  5. Election year quibbling ensues between Gibbers and Reid despite the fact they aren't running for the same position…or at least Gibbons hasn't yet made the surprise announcement that, conceding that an enraged ferret has a better chance of getting reelected than he does, Gibbons will be running for Harry Reid's senate seat in 2010, for which he will receive the unanimous support of the 17-percenter Incline villagers who really run the Nevada Republican Party. (Sun,RJ)

Gee, I hope that cleared everything up.

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